I've always been envious of those people who can comfortably cross their legs when they're sitting down. Those with the long, Jimmy Stewart-thin pegs that fit together so well, one atop the other, knee above knee, top leg dangling all loosey-goosey.
Me, I'm blessed with a couple of work-horse legs, the trunks you call on when you need an anchor for the tug-of-war. I have the thighs of an ass. When I cross my legs, there's no dangling limbs, no looseness at all. It's all about contained pressure. The energy consumed to keep the top leg crossed over the bottom is enormous and barely worth the bother. There it trembles and quivers, the right ankle perched at right angle on the left knee, gravity thrusting its constant force down, down, down on the right knee which hovers over nothingness, unsupported. A coiled weapon, ready to be unfurled and sprung upon the unsuspecting, held back only by sheer force of will.
There's no comfort in that friends.
Tuesday, November 25
You Lucky Leg-Crossin' Bastids!
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3 comments:
Consider yourself lucky Rob. Leg crossing is not as glamorous as it appears. It's a nasty habit by some of us and causes bad circulation and (if you're not careful) varicose veins.
I feel your pain, Rob. Literally. The only place I can cross my legs with any kind of comfort is in the theatre or on a plane, where my toe can hook onto the seat ahead. Those who sit in front of me in the theatre or on an airplane have my apologies. I'm not kicking the back of your seat to annoy you. So stop shooting me the dirty looks, OK?
On a similar note I suffer from leg crossing issues as well. My bony knees tend to pinch the nerves leading to my foot on the 'down' leg causing numbness. The same sort of thing happens to both feet due to bony elbow pressure on knees during 'toilet' time. One time both legs were essentially paralyzed after a particulary long bowel movement whilst reading the Financial Post. Thought I had had a stroke...
Calico, bored at work.
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