Saturday, August 7

MaryJane, Patellar I Love Her

It is getting ridiculously funny now. The sitcom that is the Miami Dolphins' offseason. It's enough to make a DolFan weep.

Even before Ricky "I'm retiring in the prime of my career to pursue other interests and besides football doesn't excite me anymore and it's not about those pending marijuana fines but it kinda is and boy would it be great to play for the Oakland Raiders next year" Williams stunned the Dolphins with his surprise retirement, the Dolphins off-season was a mess. But when the player that the whole offense (an already weak and not very effective offense) is designed around, when that player retires suddenly and without warning, that hurts your chances to have a good season.

Still, we think as fans, all hope is not lost. Perhaps instead of relying so much on the running game, perhaps the offense will be forced to utilize the receiving corps more. Perhaps that will be a good thing and they'll surprise everyone. After all, the Dolphins did take a huge risk in getting former pro-bowl receiver David Boston, that so-called nutjob who couldn't fit in with the last two teams he played with. David Boston would now be the star of the offense, right? The Dolphins would show the NFL that getting Boston was a gamble that will pay off big time, right?

Yesterday, David Boston, while running a routine deep passing route, tore his Pateller tendon and is out for the season. Yet, even though hopes were shifted from Williams to Boston, and Boston's injury should be stunningly catastrophic, we all knew that Boston wasn't going to pay off for the Dolphins anyway, because the Dolphins don't have a quarterback with skills enough to get the ball to him, so no big loss right? So, his injury doesn't really matter, right?

What a mess. The good news is that the offense has pretty much eradicated itelf of players whose injury or departure will further hurt the team.

Therefore, it's time for the defensive players to start quitting and getting injured. With its current roster, Miami's defense should still be one of the best this season, and a great defense can take an otherwise mediocre team all the way to the SuperBowl. So, with the defense go my hopes and expectations for a successful season.

I hear, though, that to celebrate their potential dominance, the Dolphin defensive players are all going to take a cruise off the Miami coast. A three hour tour. Not to worry, though, it's reported that the mate is a mighty sailing man and the skipper's brave and sure. So nothing should happen to them, right?

1 comment:

dylan said...

Tough year to be a Dolphins fan Rob. I've never really sworn allegiance to an individual team. Well I did but it was the Raiders and now I'm in recovery. The key to move on Rob is just enjoying the games on their own merits and keeping an eye on players of exceptional skill. I love watching Vick, Favre, Manning, Portis, Holmes, Ray Lewis, Ty Law, and many others. I've basically got about 10 teams I cheer for in a very complex system of favourites in case they play one another.