Wednesday, May 19

Three Times A Diva

I am only continuing to post American Idol reviews because I have strange need to see this to its completion. Can't wait til the awful show is finished.

The problem with only three singers left is that, to fill out an hour, they have to sing three songs each. And that means three sets of dischordant combinations of notes, emitted without emotion through the mouth, via vocal chords (sorry, I meant 'songs') from The Hawaiin Tourism Campaign.

Anything that I could say about the singing talents of the remaining three, I’ve said before, and last night showed me nothing new. Jasmine was awful. Diana was bubbly soda pop that is already getting flat and stale. Somebody put a cork in that bottle, please. Fantasia showed exactly why she is the only person remaining in the competition who deserves to succeed.

Clive Davis was great as a judge. When Randy doesn’t come back next year, they should give Clive his spot. Of course, they won’t because he’s old and nobody from The Idiotic Masses of America™ cares what he says. They’ll want Randy replaced with a cute boy. Speaking of cute boys, I got worried when Paula “stupid” Abdul told Fantasia that she doesn’t even need this competition anymore. TIMoA, were you listening? That means vote for someone else.

"don't need this show"?? What the hell does that mean for the relevance of the stupid show? Why bother following through then? Get down to the final two or three, to hell what The Idiotic Masses of America™ ultimately decide. Push the one who has the most potential to make money for people. That’s what they did last year with Clay Aiken. I’ll bet most people actually think he won the American Idol competition last year. He came second, but he really did win it. Ruben is pretty much just a sandwich again. And an area code.

So, it doesn’t matter who gets kicked off tonight. I’ll be shocked and amazed if it’s Fantasia leaving, but then, I’d be shocked and amazed if she makes it to the final two. Stupid The Idiotic Masses of America.

Wherever she winds up, she’s the only one from this show that anybody’ll be talking about in a year from now.

And you can take that prediction to the Bank of Hawaii.


Alan said...

What I saw last night was the last AI in this format. If Fantasia goes, it will be something I would bet on. Booting off the capabile to win a boostering contest is what it has become. Liked the Ryan Malcolm 1.75 seconds of fame. Nice Faux-hawk.

Nils Ling said...

God help me, but Diana has grown on me. Maybe like moss on my north side, but still. If she were managed properly and gently led to an appropriate genre of music (say, country), she has potential. I mean, I'd never buy a CD with her on it .. but the same could be said for all three. Fantasia's voice does the fingernails on the blackboard thing to me, and Jasmine is just ... well, just fated to be appearing at the Holiday Inn Lounge in Honolulu for the rest of her life.